A Coach Of Character

When it comes to talking about character, especially building character, few expressions come to mind as quickly as the time-honored "sport builds character."

There are countless thousands of past and present athletes-including U.S. presidents such as Gerald Ford-who credit their coaches for helping them learn first-hand the profound meaning and significance of that expression. You may very well be one of those countless thousands.

I've often said that athletic coaches shaped my character as profoundly as anyone else-with the exception of my parents, of course, and one minister.

Of the many coaches I'm indebted to, coach stands out above all others, a coach to whom 1 can never repay my debt. A coach who has not only profoundly shaped my character but who has taught me much about the essence of character-about what it is, about how it is developed, about what it can be, about how it is everything.

That coach is the one to whom 1 have dedicated this book, Mr. Tae Wae Haw, my Tae Kwon Do instructor of some 10 years or so.

in the tradition and spirit of all truly great coaches, Mr. Haw coaches and teaches about character more than anything else. He is most definitely a master at teaching skills-like those of self-defense-but his greatest mastery lies in his dedication and ability to teach skills of character.

It took me quite awhile to realize, even long after I had earned my I st-degree black belt, that what Mr. Haw is all about-what he is really after-is personal character. And 1 don't mean "character" in the abstract or in theory. His approach to teaching and coaching is always very practical, sometimes painfully practical: Developing and honing these specific strengths of character, facing up to and overcoming these specific weaknesses of character.

He's the type of mentor par excellence who helps you learn the hard way about character what you thought you "knew" the easy way. And sometimes, hard lessons about character can only be learned the hard way.

Like the first time I got kicked-and kicked really hard-between the legs while sparring. Predictably, 1 fell to my knees and doubled over, grimmacing in pain. All 1 remember is that next, in an instant, Mr. Haw picked me up from behind, made me stand up, and thundered, "Are you just going to stay down and cover your head like a frightened puppy after someone has attacked you on the street?! Are you going to ask them, 'please wait a second so I can catch toy breath?' You'll be dead!"

Then immediately he said in a "don't-make-me-say-it-again" tone of voice: "Continue!"